#SixSunday

March 26, 2011 by Skyla

From my YA paranormal WIP today.

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I couldn’t see then because I broke. Like the plate I threw at Violet, everything that seemed strong and solid cracked, smashed, fell in pieces to the floor. My knees wavered, shoulders slumped, head went dizzy and I felt like I needed to throw up and lie down and cry and scream and all kinds of other things all at once.Oh god, I just wanted him back...

Vaughn was closer, hands on my shoulders, and it was only because something solid touched me then, held me up, that I realized I was trembling bone-deep. "Dess..."

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More Six Sentence Sunday here: http://sixsunday.blogspot.com

Comments

#1 Six Sunday

March 26, 2011 by Gayle (not verified)

Really good description, there. Like the use of the word "broke", too :)

#2 Wow!

March 26, 2011 by Sarah Grimm (not verified)

I don't normally read YA, but find myself wanting to read this one. You have to finish it so I can. :)

#3 Wow!

March 26, 2011 by Sarah Grimm (not verified)

Did my comment go to moderation or disappear? I hate it when I can't tell....

I don't normally read YA, but want to read this one!

#4 I love that line....I broke.

March 26, 2011 by Viviane Brentanos (not verified)

I love that line....I broke. Oh I remember feeling that way

#5 Great six

March 26, 2011 by Cate Masters (not verified)

Really felt her confusion and pain. Great job.

#6 Wow, great description. I

March 26, 2011 by Marie Dees (not verified)

Wow, great description. I know just how she feels!

#7 wow. what fantastic imagery!

March 26, 2011 by lexcade (not verified)

wow. what fantastic imagery! i love the last line about Vaughn. kinda leaves you breathless. great six!

#8 SSS

March 26, 2011 by D L Jackson (not verified)

Nice six. I wonder what it was that proceded this moment. I would definately read more.
Thanks for sharing.
D L

#9 Wow, that was gut-wrenching.

March 26, 2011 by Jessica (not verified)

Wow, that was gut-wrenching.

#10 This is lovely. Poor Dess. I

March 26, 2011 by Aislinn Kerry (not verified)

This is lovely. Poor Dess. I want to keep reading until she's okay. ^_^

#11 Great!

March 26, 2011 by Kay Springsteen (not verified)

Love the show of emotions here.

#12 Great six

March 26, 2011 by Cara Bristol (not verified)

Great writing! Wow.

#13 wow, such a vivid scene, I

March 26, 2011 by JoAnne Kenrick (not verified)

wow, such a vivid scene, I could 'see' her despair, felt it, too. Fab six xx This is one of those snippets where I just wanted to keep reading, hooked in from the first few sentences!

#14 Very deep and emotional. ~

March 26, 2011 by D. Renee Bagby (not verified)

Very deep and emotional.

~ Renee

#15 Very nice. I love your

March 26, 2011 by jayel kaye (not verified)

Very nice. I love your description of her frustration

#16 Nice six, very vivid and

March 26, 2011 by Susanna Fraser (not verified)

Nice six, very vivid and descriptive.

#17 Great emotional scene. Just

March 26, 2011 by Taryn Kincaid (not verified)

Great emotional scene. Just wonderful.

#18 teen angst the way it ought to be

March 26, 2011 by Vivien Jackson (not verified)

You get into a young person's head very well. Lovely, angsty bit here.

#19 Great six!

March 26, 2011 by Chrystalla (not verified)

Makes me wonder if that person she wants back is dead or simply left. Makes me want to read on!

#20 Incredibly emotive

March 26, 2011 by Claire Robyns (not verified)

Incredibly emotive description. love your voice

#21 Great emotion

March 26, 2011 by Ella Drake (not verified)

Very well done!

#22 Whew

March 26, 2011 by Ginger Simpson (not verified)

Love the descriptive flow of your sentences. I realized I've been "broken" a lot lately. Great job.

#23 comment

March 26, 2011 by charmaine gordon (not verified)

Wonderful description. Good luck with your writing career.

#24 Great descriptions. :)

March 26, 2011 by Pippa Jay (not verified)

Great descriptions. :)

#25 Great use of description.

March 26, 2011 by Lauri J Owen (not verified)

Great use of description.

#26 Very intense 6. Raw emotions,

March 26, 2011 by A.R. Norris (not verified)

Very intense 6. Raw emotions, which were very well written.

#27 SSS Post

March 26, 2011 by Kathleen Grieve (not verified)

Such pain! WOW! Well done!

#28 Good showing here! Her pain

March 26, 2011 by Laura Kaye (not verified)

Good showing here! Her pain is palpable!

#29 Oh, wow. Very vivid. I like!

March 26, 2011 by Ada Hoffmann (not verified)

Oh, wow. Very vivid. I like!

#30 Good stuff with raw emotion.

March 26, 2011 by Devin Harnois (not verified)

Good stuff with raw emotion. This drew me in right away and I wanted to keep reading.

#31 Awesome!

March 26, 2011 by Joleene Naylor (not verified)

I love the way you handled this! Fantastic descriptions!

#32 Wow, awesome scene. Very

March 26, 2011 by Lucy Felthouse (not verified)

Wow, awesome scene. Very tense and emotional. Love it! :)

#33 I missed this last week.

March 26, 2011 by Melissa (My World...in words and pages) (not verified)

I missed this last week. Sorry. But geez. That is some deep emotions there. Some one extremely important and close to her. Very gripping scene.

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