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Sunday Post

I gotta get blogging more. I'm just really lazy and typically post links on Twitter to whatever I'm interested in, rather than do a proper blog post. But anyways, I'm going to try to do a round up post on Sundays of nifty, random stuff.

In Skyla News, I was on limited office hours this week due to really bad wrist pain, which flares up if I don't take enough breaks for several weeks. So...ouch. And in writing news, I've been suffering a whiny case of, "Writing is hard--waaaaah!" so I've pretty much kept to myself. I don't understand why staring blankly at the screen doesn't make words appear...

First up, publishing/writing stuff.

* A great piece on writers' expectations and publishing. I love this piece. It addresses the obsession with instant success stories (which I've talked a bit about before) and the whiny "Why do crappy books get published?" thing that everyone says. And it was summed up best by the awesome Julie Butcher: "So if we're hard-heads, we win?" Yep.

* Over at Deadline Dames, Jeaniene Frost talks about piracy. We all know my thoughts on the subject *cough* so I'll just say WORD to everything there.

* Lili's Friday writing post about the fear that characters will stop talking to you if you're happier and don't share their pain. And it's a fantastic post because I've had that fear for years. I'm viewing shitty life experiences now as "taking one for the team"--they've allowed me to go to a very dark place and transform those feelings and experiences into something cathartic for others. In short, I feel like my best books are the ones I write for fellow damaged people. So if I actively work on being happier and healthier, can I still write effectively for the damaged? I don't know. But it's worth a shot.

* I wrote on the MP blog about my author checklist. This is something I've heard a LOT of editors talk about--what type of writers do they want to work with...and who do they REALLY not want around? I came up with nine qualities I've encountered that make me twitchy. I also encourage writers to come up with their checklist for publishers. I think we all have to be clear about what our expectations are for one another to make the best match possible, because really, that's how a book is going to be successful--when both parties are on the same page. I expect someone's going to get bent out of shape over it but, you know, someone's gotta say these things.

* My friend J.A. Saare has a new book out. Go read, buy, and DON'T pirate it or she and I will kick your scummy pirate ass. ;-)

Feministy things.

* A sixteen year old girl was buried alive by her family for talking to boys. I can't even begin to tell you how much this upset me--I think I spent the better part of an hour on Friday just sitting here crying. If you're interested in learning more about honour killings and those fighting against the practice, visit the fine folks at the International Campaign Against Honour Killings. They're good people.

* Follow The Pixel Project on Twitter. Every night they tweet helplines from all over the world to DV shelters. Retweet the numbers and you could save a life.

Video stuff.

This is an oldie, but it's been this weekend's theme song. Defying Gravity, Firefly/Serenity style

And Gone with the Wind with Vampires.

Randomness.

* There's a fan group on Facebook for Mike "Other Asian" Chang on Glee! This makes me happy because he's really adorable. I think he needs a storyline of his own. Or at least a few more lines.

* Finally...here's Selleck Waterfalls Sandwich. Which wins the internet.

Is Nothing Sacred?

This was via Feministing:

A pink Ouija board for girls.

Seriously.

It comes with a pink carrying case and 72 question cards because I presume girls can't think up questions on their own. One of those gems? "Who will call/text me next?"Read more

Romance vs Love Stories

You know, I have some real problems with romance sometimes.

First, don't slap me. I don't look down on the genre (and romance writers make a killing, so I envy that), and I like some mushy stuff as much as the next person. But I'm coming at this as an acquiring editor who sees a LOT of romance novels.

What bothers be about romance is that a) too often I see shortcuts taken instead of development of a real love story, and b) there's a predictability immediately (when I say "romance" we all think "boy meets girl, they have obstacles, they live happily ever after).

Well, okay, and c) it almost always consists of white, heteronormative pairings that reinforce rigid gender stereotypes and that makes Skyla's head go BOOM! But that's another talk for another day.

There are fantastic romances out there, but doing acquisitions for our romance imprint, I see the same things over and over. They are Soul Mates so they will automatically fall in love and have their HEA, regardless of what their personalities are like. The have no lives, no desires, outside of their own relationship. Everyone's goal is a diamond ring at the end. I never doubt, even once, that the boy will get the girl and they'll live on and on with no struggles forever and ever. And they're all white straight people.

You know what? No.

Love is messy. Love is hard. Love happens between people unexpectedly. Love doesn't always lead to a happily ever after. At it's best, love can help you rise above things; at it's worse, it'll suck out your soul and make you a crazy person.

As a reader, and an acquiring editor, I don't want to read about flowers and candles and That Perfect Someone. I *want* that unpredictability as two strong personalities struggle to make room for one another. I don't want that security of knowing it'll all be okay, because, you know, I'm a grown-up and I *know* there's no HEA for people who don't work for it. I don't want to read lazy writing.

And as a writer...I can't write romance to save my life. If I could, I would, then add some hawt sex and make a bundle. But I always have a love story in my work because I'm a Libra and I have love on the brain. Romance, though? Nope.

And here's the review of one of my books that got me thinking about this:

"One thing is certain beyond any doubt: Wolfe is a stunningly good book. ...[snip]... What I was less certain of as I read, was whether Wolfe can be described as a romance. The story focuses primarily on River. She is not by any stretch of the imagination your average heroine, and though the plot revolves around her struggle to rejoin the were she had chosen as lifelong mate, her animal-like personality and pragmatic approach to life precludes the standard sex-obsessed main characters that tend to populate the hotter romances. Daryl, her chosen mate, is removed from River for the biggest part of the book.

However, I would implore all fans of romance to buy this book and read it, because while it is not your average romance novel, it is a story about love. Not just the happily-ever-after fairy tale kind, the real kind, the sort of love that takes two people and cements them together in relationships that are like lighthouses on rocky shores.

In a world where too often ‘romance’ is synonymous with ‘superficial’, Wolfe is a tale that runs deeper. It was only once I’d put the book down that I realised through the absorbing entertainment, frequent laughs, and thought-provoking emotional pieces, Skyla Dawn Cameron had gently led me as reader through a thorough study of a raw, real, committed love.

To have a reviewer that Gets It is a wonderful thing--to have a reviewer put it so eloquently and quotable is one in a million.

I write about werewolves and vampires and zombie romantic comedies and all kinds of silly things. But all that stuff is window dressing. Beneath it all, I'm trying to write about people and those Real Things we all go through. Like love. And I'd love more writers to get it through their heads that their job isn't to repeat genre tropes, it's to tell a meaningful story that feels real to the reader.

So I don't write romance. I write loves stories (amidst all the killing and violence and Damaged Main Characters [TM]). And some days, at least for some readers, I get it right. This is a Good Thing.

(Also, that picture is--obviously--not the Wolfe book cover...it's the promo poster I made featuring the two MC's.)

HNTBADBA 101 - Am I a Douche Bag?

Welcome to a new edition of HNTBADBA 101.

Yes folks, it's been quiet over the holidays. It's not that I haven't had anything to rant about, it's just that I've been too busy yelling at people to blog about why I'm yelling at people. But here's a question from a writer that I thought might fit.

Warning: this column will regularly feature lots of profanity. So Sensitive Speshul Snowflakes can go elsewhere.

It's Advice Column Friday! Read on.

Question du Jour...

Why do agents & editors twitch when authors refer to their novels as fiction? I've seen a few things on FB & Twitter about agents/editors getting their panties in a bunch when that shows up in a query.

Just wondering...

This might be a good question for your blog, too. I think a lot of newbie authors don't understand why it's taboo to call your ms an adult fiction novel.

You're right, it *is* a good question for the blog, which is why I used it for this column.

One thing every writer has to learn is not to be redundant. Say something once and don't repeat yourself unless its necessary for some other reason. So don't tell me about the vampire's twinkling sparkles. Just say he sparkles, 'cause twinkling isn't necessary.

Actually, don't say he sparkles either because vampires don't sparkle, people.

"Fiction novel" is redundant. With very, very few exceptions (and I can't even think of one but never say never), if you say that you're querying/submitting a novel, we're going to assume it's fiction. And "fiction" isn't a genre, so you shouldn't use it as an adjective for novel. Urban fantasy? Futuristic romance? Comedic horror? Those are all genres. We don't typically consider "fiction" to be a genre, and tacking it on to describe your novel inducing eye-rolling from agents and editors.

Please note that it does NOT make you a douche bag. No one is going to reject you based on using "fiction novel" in a query (well, I might if it otherwise lacked sparkle and my slush pile was sitting in the hundreds). But it's the first red flag that you're an amateur, and that's not an impression you want to leave with an editor or agent.

And as for why we get twitchy over it...just imagine our slush piles for a moment. Now imagine that every three cover letters, we see that "fiction novel" mistake. When those things happen over and over, we get whiny, and since Twitter is RIGHT THERE for when we want to ZOMGWHINE&BITCHABOUTAUTHORS, all you lovely kids get to see us twitch.

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Have a question you want to ask? Drop a line to notadouchebag@skyladawncameron.com Read Da Rules here.

Disclaimer! The opinions expressed herein are those of the person who wrote them and in no way represent any company anywhere on the planet. If you don't like it, and can't take this kind of humour, kindly walk away and don't be a fucktard.

For past issues, please head here.

Did you know that you can subscribe directly to the HNTBADBA 101 feed? Click here.

On Advice

The lovely Shayne Winters and I had a beer at the pub today (well, she had Pepsi because she's the designated driver) and got talking about, of course, publishing because that's just what two writers/editors do. We're interesting like that.

We got discussing the multitude advice out there. Everyone has some and they REALLY want to dish it out. And often they seem like they know wtf they're talking about.

And the simple truth is that every writer out there is hungry for The Secret. The handshake, the password, the golden ticket, that ONE thing that's going to get them in the door and published.

The truth? Write a book that people want to read, and write it well.

There are lots of other factors (be professional and not a twat, follow the guidelines, have a website, put your left foot in and take your left foot out, blah blah). But everyone wants to look at all those little factors and NOT the important one: write well and make it something people want to read.

That self promotion thing? It's all well and good but the truth is that no one knows, for sure, what exactly works there. What works for me won't necessarily work for you. You can do as much or as little as me and see totally different results. There are ways to promote well, yes, but that's not a guarantee it'll be effective. The beautiful website? Kids, every agent and editor agrees that a web presence is a must, but we've still contracted authors without having a site yet. There's nothing on the "do we sign this person?" checklist for an active blog.

All the other pre-publishing advice? That din of noise with everyone telling you this and that? Look kids, I talk a lot about the other factors here because I'm already assuming that you're writing well. So I stress the guidelines, I tell you to buck up and not whine, I warn about the many frustrations in the industry. But following the guidelines is not magically going to make someone accept your book if the book sucks. Being a nice, funny person isn't going to magically make someone accept your book if the books sucks. Having teh most fabulous website or doing the hokey pokey isn't going to magically make someone accept your book. Previous publishing credits, legit or otherwise, won't magically make someone take your next book.

If you're looking for a shortcut and ignoring that important piece of the puzzle--the book--that tells me you don't have enough confidence in your work to let it stand on your own. That should tell YOU that you have a problem, and no number of acceptance letters will solve it for you.

So. Advice. Who do you listen to in the din? Agents say one thing, which sometimes overlaps with editors, and then authors say something that may or may not match with what you've just heard and, oh yeah, all those unpublished people have opinions and speak loudly too. It's getting pretty noisy out there.

Well, what kind of writer do you want to be?

Play a game with me for a moment. What kind of writer do you want to be like? Not whose books are like yours, necessarily, but who has the career you'd love?

Shayne and I played this game today over Keith's White (not as good as Rickards, btw) and Pepsi. I said, hands down, I want to be Lilith Saintcrow when I grow up. Besides her utterly honest and gracious online persona (okay, so I'll never have that going for me), I greatly admire both her work ethic and her writing ability. She writes wonderful books with emotional resonance wrapped in an entertaining package, she puts out a couple a year without sacrificing quality, and she manages to support her family doing it. That's the kind of career I want; that's the kind of writer I want to be. So when Lili posts her Friday writing blog posts, I'm there. I'm listening. No two writers will ever have the same career path, but I know that if I want to be the kind of writer who lives off of fiction writing and puts out a couple books a year, I need to pay attention to what writers like her are doing.

Shayne is taking Holly Lisle's Think Sideways course. Ms. Lisle is someone who has dozens of books published and Shayne really admires her ability to work under deadlines, keep producing quality work, and how she conquers the challenges of being a working, professional writer. She says the course has been invaluable to her.

So when you, gentle reader who is also a writer, are wondering whose advice to take when it's all loud and a little conflicting, MY advice (and it really is just that) is to think about where you want your career to go. Are you the hobbyist who dabbles in different areas for fun? Listen to dabbling hobbyists--you'll make great friends and enjoy yourself. Are you the Great Canadian Novelist who puts out one book every three years? Find the authors like that and pay attention to their stories of how they got there (and then tell me who they are 'cause I have no fucking clue). Do you want to support your family as a working fiction writer? Obviously, checking out advice from Lili and Holly would be a good start.

Looking for the quick fix? Drawn to the stories of instant success, the exceptions to the rule?

Folks, if the rule is that hard work, talent, and perseverance lead to publication, please explain to me WHY you would like to be the exception to that? Or, better yet, ask *yourself* why you don't think this craft, this calling, is worth your blood, sweat, and tears.

Because my opinion? Writing is worth the pain and effort that I put into it, and the quick path to success isn't fucking good enough for me. My advice? If you don't feel the same, go buy a lotto ticket 'cause I don't think you belong in this field.

FWIW, YMMV

Skyla the Email Slayer

"One girl in all the world with the strength and skill to hit the 'reply' button. She alone will fight the questions, submissions, and the forces of douchebagginess. She is the Slayer."

In today's episode, Skyla stakes and turns to dust all those emails that came in during vacation while only breaking one or two nails, and makes eyes at that tall, brooding email with a soul. But can she stop the avalanche of slush from destroying all of Mundania-dale?


(This is how I amuse myself and stay sane, kids. Otherwise I might knock off liquor stores or something. It doesn't help that I recently watched 144 eps of Buffy back to back.)

Read more

Resolutions and Goals

I'm one of those people who doesn't do resolutions 'cause they never seem to stick. I very easily slip back into self-destructive patterns, usually due to mood swings, so it does me no good to "resolve" to do something. But I think this year I'll resolve to drink more beer. If I succeed, yay, beer! If I fail, yay for my liver! See? Win-win.

Goals, though. I'm an ambitious person, so I really ought to have those. I have numerous ones in both my personal and professional life that I'm not going to list here because if I'm going to fail, I'd rather not do it publicly. But the number one thing that I will share?

I'm going to chillax.

I have a fighter, alpha personality. It's why I'm good at a lot of things but also why I'm miserable all the time. I get my armour on, my weapon ready, and head charging into battle because I'm cursed not only with the desire to always be right but to make sure everyone else knows it too.

Now, I think fighting is quite healthy, to an extent, so I won't go all soft and hippy on people...BUT my goal is to worry less and pick better battles. Not everything has to be a war. Well, exercising is a war. I got a new sports bra for Christmas (after another fucking battle of trying to find them in my size--WTF, people? DD girls like to exercise too without their tits slapping them in the face while they run!), and putting that thing on is like wearing battle armour. So I think I'll spend my battle energy on physical things, so I'm ready for the zombie invasion. The other things in life? I'm going to work on shrugging them off. My health will improve if I have less stress. And, I mean, last month I was facing weeks without groceries and major financial problems, but generous people stepped in and rescued me, like something out of a made for TV Christmas movie starring a C-level actress as me. I keep facing the worse possible things that could happen in my life, and I somehow survive, so...I'm just going to start trusting rather than worrying.

(Well, excerpt for the zombies--there needs to be some worry there. I mean, I have plans, but I need to be able to outrun them when they evolve to be fast, 28 Days Later ones, plus they could mutate into something that won't be dispatched with just a shovel to the head.)

Look: No Ranting!

When life gets you down, it's important to have a zen place. YouTube is a good place to find some zen. And some things that make you twitch, but try to avoid those ones. The surprised kitten video? Zen. Fan made trailer with photoshopped actors in a Thundercats movie? Zen.

Fucking epic Buffy trailer? ZEN WIN.

A little known fact about me is that I'm a total vidding nerd. Like, I spent four years making Buffy, Final Fantasy VIII, Final Fantasy X-2, and Veronica Mars vids. I even remember the old buffyvids.com site and used to find and download them all the time. But the one embedded above is lovely--mad, mad skillz.

Zen.

Editor Pet Peeve: Participial Phrases

There are lots of types of participial phrases. I'll leave you to learn about them all. The one that drives me bonkers, though, is present participial, and when it's stuck at the beginning of the sentence.

Lots of new writers fall into the pattern of starting sentences the same way. The. He. She. I. Then someone points it out to them, and they're all, "OMG! I must do something more interesting!" so they start rearranging sentences. And they think it's a good idea to stick a present participial phrase at the start of the sentence, 'cause look! Now it doesn't start with the/he/she/I! Now it starts with a verb! I iz greatest author evah!

*twitch*

Okay, let's look at one of these babies for a moment.

Original sentence: He walked across the room and opened the door.

That's a solid sentence. Dry, but serviceable. Then the writer thinks OMGICAN'TSTARTWITHHE!!!

So it gets changed: Walking across the room, he opened the door.

THEREOMGTHAT'SPERFECT!

Please reread that.

He's opening the door while he's walking across the room? How effing small IS this damn room?

Besides the fact that frequently starting sentences that way is bloody irritating to read (seriously, no more than once or twice a page--if you're doing more than that, the frequent "ing" rhythm is damn annoying...it disrupts the flow of language and if you're trying for tension, you're going to lose it), it often has two things happening together at the same time that can't actually happen at the same time.

Let's look at another one that I've seen all too often:

Reaching across the desk, she opened the book.

Again...she's opening WHILE she's reaching?

Or:

Crying out his name, she kissed him long and hard.

Um, I don't think he wants to kiss a chick who is crying his name while her lips are sealed with his.

So how do you, newbie writer, make these sentences interesting without relying on starting with the/he/she/I or a present participial phrase?

Well, stop telling me what's going on, first of all. Let me (the reader) feel it. His heavy boots thudded on the worn hardwood as he crossed the room. A final glance over his shoulder at the empty space left behind revealed a room smaller and darker than the one from childhood memories. His fingers closed around the doorknob and gave the handle a hard twist to the right. He stared straight ahead, determined not to look back, and with a deep breath moved through the threshold.

Okay, still not great, but you know what? It's better. PLUS we've gone from one dull sentence to four that actually give you a sense of the space and character.

The ing-disease doesn't always mean you have a conflict of two things happening that can't happen at the same time. But they're awkward as hell and should only be used by those who know what they're doing.

Now, be good little bunnies and do a sweep for these in your next manuscript. Any competent editor would help you fix it in the first place, but then your chances of getting a competent editor when your manuscript is riddled with these is pretty slim.

16 Days of Activism 2009

November 25th kicked off the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Based Violence.

This year's theme: Commit ▪ Act ▪ Demand: We CAN End Violence Against Women!

Last year I wrote about "grey" rape, and took a slightly different angle with it from a more personal perspective. This year...I don't quite know what I'm going to write about, but expect plenty of posting on this subject during the next few weeks.

What I will do, however, is remind you to buy your copy of Nothing But Red. The proceeds go to Equality Now, and it has work by some amazing people I admire, such as Joss Whedon, Lilith Saintcrow, Ann Aguirre, Elaine Corvidae, Hanne Blank, Ellen Sheeley, and so many other people--just go check out the contributors to see it all. It's an arts anthology--there's fiction, non-fiction, poetry, photography, art...it's really a fantastic collection. Read Joss's essay that started it all here, check out the foreword, some beautiful and heartbreaking art, and as I find other pieces shared online, I'll link to them in other posts.

(And if you're okay with a bit of a downer, here are my thoughts on the two year anniversary of Du'a Khalil's death.)

And here are a couple of reviews:

Nothing But Red, while sometimes dark and horrifying, is an extremely powerful and exceptional piece of work. Please do not think, though, that every story in this book is violent or that it contains nothing positive or hopeful. There are many contributions that tell of strong women who are determined to get out of their situation, to be free and live. There is hope contained within the pages of this very eloquent book just as I believe that there is hope for women of the world. The fact that this book even exists is, to me, is definite proof of that.

via Bitten by Books

Beautifully crafted, NOTHING BUT RED brings home, with stunning clarity, the fact that anybody who believes that violence against women is something that only happens in certain countries, amongst people of certain religions, or is a thing of the past, is sadly mistaken. This could be YOUR mother, YOUR sister, YOUR daughter, friend or niece. This could be YOU. The words and images captured in these pages will not fail to stir you to your very soul. The writing is raw, poignant and heartfelt. The images are haunting. Reading this book left me feeling frightened, horrified, saddened, disgusted, bewildered and enraged. It also left me with a burning desire to be a part of the solution, to help assure that "honor killings" and other atrocities become a thing of the past. Most importantly, it left me with a feeling of hope. Hope that because of the passion and conviction of the talented women and men who contributed to NOTHING BUT RED, things can change.

via a reader review on GoodReads

And for good measure, because it never gets old:

I encourage everyone reading this to post your own thoughts during the next two weeks about gendered violence.